I'm more often than not a happy-go-lucky gal. Woman would most likely be the best term to use there, but I refuse to admit I'm actually twenty-six!! Okay. So, in an attempt to maintain my preferred relaxed demeanor, I often suppress things. Much like my age. See? I just did it again! Geesh!
I believe it's a form of escapism. Due to dealing with excessive amounts of "crap" in my life, I've developed this way of dealing/not dealing with things. Seems to work out alright until I get that snowball effect going.
Life at work has become quite a snowball. In case I haven't mentioned it before, I'm the director of an outreach program for youth, and the clerical assistant, here at our lowly nonprofit. I love what we do, but my works been a bit questionable for me lately. I've been seriously thinking about severing my own head with a sharpie, in attempt to relieve some stress. Not just in that last long hour either.
I've been extremely stressed about all the stuff I have to do and the fact that there's not enough time to do it. I have two full-time positions as one. And I'm salary. We're a nonprofit. I understand, but it's been getting to me.
So, I became completely discouraged, didn't want to do any of it and started looking for another job. See? COMPLETE AND TOTAL ESCAPISM!!!
Yesterday, I finally spilled my guts to my boss. I didn't cry at first. I worked up to that. She reacted remarkably well. I was certain I'd be looking for another job, or at least be bumped to part time, which I can't afford.
We discussed the root of the problem, and she offered a solution that I didn't know was an option. Things are looking up! Perhaps escapism is not the best way to deal (or not to deal) with things after all. I'm amazed!
Side Note: My boss is pretty awesome.